150 Best December Jokes and Puns To Sleigh Your Holiday Season

Ready to sleigh the holiday season with laughter? December is here, bringing festive cheer and a whole lot of opportunities for some seriously punny humor!

If you’re looking to spread some holiday joy and maybe a few eye-rolls (the good kind!), you’ve come to the right place. Get ready to deck the halls with hilarity as we dive into the best December jokes and puns guaranteed to make you the life of the party.

From frosty one-liners to Christmas cracker classics, we’ve got a joke for every occasion this December. Let the pun-tastic fun begin!

Best December Jokes and Puns To Sleigh Your Holiday Season

• Why did December try to get a loan? Because it needed funds for all the year-end expenses!
• I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She seemed surprised. Especially since it’s December and everyone is surprised.
• December is like the Friday of months. Everyone is excited, but it goes by too quickly, and you’re left wondering where all the time went.
• What do you call an elf who sings? A Wrapper! Especially in December.
• Why was the snowman crying in December? He had a meltdown!
• Heard about the December 26th sale? It’s un-believable!
• I’m putting up my December decorations. It’s beginning to look a lot like chaos.
• December: The only month where you can burn down an entire tree in your living room and it’s considered festive.
• What’s December’s favorite game? Hide and seek the sun!
• My bank account after December looks like it’s participating in a polar plunge.
• I’m not saying December is stressful, but my therapist has already started decorating her office for January.
• Why did the calendar get arrested in December? For having too many dates!
• Me trying to be productive in December: “I’ll be back in 5 minutes, I just need to watch one holiday movie…or ten.”
• What do you call a grumpy reindeer in December? Miser-deer-able!
• December: When your to-do list is longer than Santa’s nice list.

December Jokes: The Funniest Online Finds to Share

Need a little festive cheer? December jokes and puns are the perfect way to lighten the mood! Discover the funniest online finds to share and spread holiday laughter. From Santa zingers to winter wordplay, these jokes will bring smiles to family gatherings and brighten up your social media feeds. Get…

• I’m Decembering myself to a month of hot cocoa, fuzzy socks, and ignoring all responsibilities until January.
• Warning: December may spontaneously cause excessive spending, holiday-themed movie marathons, and a strong desire to avoid all human contact.
• Why did the snow globe get a therapist in December? It had too many issues swirling around inside and needed to figure out how to deal with the winter blues.
• I’m putting the “ho” in “holiday cheer”, because my December fashion sense is all about comfort and questionable choices.
• December is like a software update; it takes forever to install, and you’re not entirely sure if it’s actually any better afterward, but you hope for the best.
• I tried to make a December-themed joke, but it was too corny, I guess I need to find some new material to get in the holiday spirit.
• My December dating life is like a snow globe: pretty to look at from a distance, but cold, isolating, and filled with swirling uncertainties and a lack of true connection.
• I’m convinced that the secret to a perfect December is a combination of Christmas carols, a roaring fire, and a complete disregard for my credit card balance.
• December is the month where I attempt to be a responsible adult, but then remember that it’s the holidays, and all bets are off, pure chaos.
• Why did the calendar get a therapist in December? Because it had too many dates to keep track of and couldn’t handle the pressure of the holiday season.
• I’m so ready for December, I’ve already started practicing my “I love it!” face for all the questionable gifts I’m about to receive.
• I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She seemed surprised it was December and everyone is in a festive mood.
• My brain cells during December are all on vacation, leaving me to operate on autopilot and questionable decisions, but it’s the holidays, so it’s okay.
• This December, I’m challenging myself to learn a new skill: pretending I’m not completely stressed out about holiday shopping and family gatherings.
• I’m adding “professional holiday light stringer” to my resume this December, because I can untangle a strand of lights faster than Santa can deliver presents.

December Jokes for Kids: Snow Much Fun

December is a month for laughter! “December Jokes for Kids: Snow Much Fun” brings a flurry of giggles with winter-themed puns and jokes. It’s perfect for keeping little ones entertained during the holidays and those long winter breaks. Get ready for snow-stopping humor!

• December is the month where I attempt to bake gingerbread houses worthy of Pinterest and end up with structurally unsound cookie shacks.
• What do you call a snowman in July? Decomposed.
• My December workout plan involves briskly walking to the fridge and lifting snacks to my mouth, a surprisingly effective workout for the soul.
• I’m convinced that December was invented to test how many holiday-themed movies a person can watch before going insane.
• Why did the Christmas tree go to the doctor in December? It was feeling a little sappy and had a bad case of tinsel-itis.
• Warning: December may spontaneously cause excessive spending, holiday-themed movie marathons, and a strong desire to avoid all human contact, or all three.
• This December, I am adding “professional cookie decorator” to my resume because I can spread frosting like no one else.
• I’m not saying I’m obsessed with December, but my car now only plays holiday music, even in July.
• I’m convinced that the secret ingredient to a perfect Christmas is a generous helping of denial about the calories.
• December: The month where I feel like I’m trapped in a snow globe, constantly shaken by the wind and surrounded by a blizzard of existential dread.
• This December, I’m exploring new hobbies, like staring blankly at the wall and contemplating the absence of sunlight, and I am getting good at it.
• My dating life this December is like a snow globe: pretty to look at from a distance, but cold, isolating, and filled with swirling uncertainties.
• I have so mushroom in my heart for you this December, the season of love, laughter, and friendship.
• I tried to make a joke about December, but it was too corny and I didn’t want to be cancelled, some things must be kept to myself.
• What does a reindeer use to do her hair in December? Scare-spray, for that extra spooky hold, always keeping it creepy and kooky.

December Puns for Adults: Holiday Humor to Get You Through

Survive the holiday chaos with a dose of December humor! “December Puns for Adults” offers witty wordplay to lighten the mood during stressful gatherings and gift wrapping marathons. From festive puns to clever quips, this collection provides much-needed laughter. Embrace the holiday spirit with jokes that’ll definitely sleigh!

• December is my favorite month because I can get away with wearing pajamas all day and blame it on the holiday spirit.
• I’m convinced that the secret to a perfect December is a combination of Christmas carols, a roaring fire, and a complete disregard for my credit card balance.
• This December, my goal is to perfectly recreate those Pinterest-worthy gingerbread houses, fully knowing it’ll end up looking like a gingerbread shack.
• I’m not one for caroling, but I can certainly sleigh some Christmas cookies.
• I’m putting up my December decorations, it’s beginning to look a lot like chaos, but it is organized chaos and I love every minute of it.
• My December dating life is like a snow globe: pretty to look at from a distance, but cold, isolating, and filled with swirling uncertainties.
• This December, I’m challenging myself to learn a new skill: pretending I’m not completely stressed out about holiday shopping and family gatherings, it is a true test of strength.
• I tried to get a December bonus at work, but my boss said my performance was a little ice-y, which I think is harsh.
• My doctor said I need to cut back on stress this holiday season, but I’m not sure if that’s possible with all the family gatherings and shopping.
• They say I have a December spending problem, but I call it spreading holiday cheer, and I am sticking with that.
• I’m convinced that the best way to survive December is to surround yourself with cute puppies and call it a “puppy-powered therapy system.”
• I’m just exploring my elf this December.
• This December, my dating strategy involves wearing a mistletoe hat and hoping to attract a partner with a similar festive spirit, or at least someone who doesn’t mind getting kissed.
• I’m going to need a long December vacation to recover from all the holiday cheer, family gatherings, and excessive eggnog consumption.
• My pet reindeer ran away last night, I am hoping he will return to the North Pole, with my best wishes.

December Social Media Puns: Captions That Sleigh

December’s here, and so is the pun-tastic content! Level up your social media game with captions that “sleigh” this holiday season. From “snow-stopping” jokes to “fir-gettable” one-liners, discover the perfect witty phrase to spread some festive cheer and maybe even elicit a chuckle or two. Let the “holi-days” be filled…

• December is the month where my to-do list is longer than Santa’s nice list, but my motivation is shorter than a holiday elf.
• I’m trying to cut back on holiday spending, but these sales are un-fir-gettable, it is really bringing me down.
• Warning: December may spontaneously cause excessive gift-wrapping, sugar cookie consumption, and a strong desire to avoid all social gatherings.
• This December, I’m challenging myself to learn a new skill: pretending I’m not completely stressed out about holiday shopping and family gatherings.
• I have mixed emotions about December; half of me wants to conquer the world, the other half wants to take a month-long nap.
• December in the office: Trying to focus on spreadsheets when all you can think about is holiday parties and eggnog, it is a difficult time.
• My December dating life is like a snow globe: pretty to look at from a distance, but cold, isolating, and filled with swirling uncertainties.
• I’m convinced that the secret to a perfect December is a combination of Christmas carols, a roaring fire, and a complete disregard for my diet.
• This December, I’m embracing my inner elf: spreading holiday cheer and leaving a trail of glitter wherever I go, because that is my job.
• I’m convinced that the best way to handle the stress of December is by treating myself to a daily dose of peppermint mocha and pretending I’m a sophisticated holiday connoisseur.
• My therapist told me to embrace December. So, I hugged a Christmas tree and declared it my new best friend, we are getting along great.
• December is the month where I feel like I’m trapped in a snow globe, constantly shaken by the wind and surrounded by a blizzard of existential dread.
• Why did the calendar get a therapist in December? Because it had too many dates and couldn’t handle the pressure of the holiday season.
• December’s official motto: “May your days be merry and bright, and may all your credit card bills be paid by next year.”
• I’m not saying I’m obsessed with December, but my car now only plays holiday music, even in July, and I’m not afraid to say it.

Christmas-Themed December Jokes: Making Spirits Bright

December’s here, and so are the Christmas-themed jokes! Let’s face it, a little holiday humor can make even the busiest season brighter. From Santa puns to elf antics, these jokes are designed to spread cheer and laughter. So, deck the halls with boughs of holly and get ready for some…

• I’m only a morning person on December 25th.
• I love putting up Christmas decorations, it’s the one time of year I’m encouraged to hang around the house.
• This December, I’m on a new 31-day diet: I see food, and I eat it.
• December must be a mathematician, because it’s all about adding up the expenses and subtracting the savings.
• I’m convinced that the best way to spread Christmas cheer is singing loud for all to hear and then promptly tripping over the extension cord.
• I’m not saying I’m obsessed with Christmas, but my neighbor just sent me a cease and desist letter for playing carols 24/7.
• This December, I’m going to try and follow my Christmas budget, but all these sales are making me sleigh the budget.
• I tried to start a diet in December, but my brain just kept autocorrecting to “cookies” and “hot cocoa.”
• I’m convinced that the secret to a perfect December is a combination of Christmas carols, a roaring fire, and a complete disregard for my waistline.
• December is the only month you can set your house on fire with a tree and presents and celebrate it.
• I’m not sure what’s more challenging, untangling Christmas lights or finding a parking spot at the mall this December.
• This December, I’m challenging myself to learn a new skill: wrapping oddly shaped presents without losing my mind and using copious amounts of tape.
• I’ve decided to embrace the December weather by dressing like a yeti and communicating solely through carols and interpretive snow dances.
• I’m not saying I’m obsessed with the holidays, but my GPS now only gives directions to the nearest Christmas tree lot and holiday markets.
• I’m convinced that the secret to a perfect December is a combination of Christmas carols, a roaring fire, and a complete disregard for my credit card balance.

Winter-Specific December Jokes: Embrace the Chill with Laughter

December’s here, and the frosty air calls for cozy vibes and hearty laughter! Dive into winter-specific December jokes and puns that perfectly capture the season’s chill. From snow day shenanigans to Santa’s silly side, embrace the lighter side of the year’s end with humor that warms you right up. Get…

• December: When your bank account is screaming “Insufficient Funds” but your heart is singing “Jingle Bells”.
• I’m putting up my Christmas decorations so early this year, I’m pretty sure my neighbors think I’m having a prolonged festive fever dream.
• This December, I’m going to try and eat healthier; my plan is to balance every cookie with a carrot, it’s called the “Santa’s Helper” diet.
• Why did the snowman break up with the snowwoman in December? Because he felt she was being too cold and distant during the holidays.
• December is the month where my to-do list is longer than Santa’s nice list, and my motivation is shorter than an elf’s attention span.
• I’m writing a book about December, but it’s a chilling tale of holiday shopping stress and the struggle to find the perfect gift.
• My December social life is like a snow globe: pretty to look at, but mostly just swirling around in circles with no real direction.
• What’s a snowman’s favorite dessert in December? Ice cream cake, because even snowmen like to indulge in a sweet treat during the holidays.
• I’m convinced that the secret to surviving December is a combination of hot cocoa, fuzzy socks, and a complete avoidance of all responsibilities.
• This December, my goal is to finally learn how to wrap presents like a professional, but I am sure I’ll still use copious amounts of tape.
• I’m not saying I’m obsessed with December, but my car now only plays holiday music, even in July, and I am not afraid to say it.
• This December, I’m challenging myself to learn a new skill: pretending I’m not completely stressed out about holiday shopping and family gatherings.
• Why did the Christmas tree go to the doctor in December? Because it was feeling a little sappy and had a bad case of tinsel-itis.
• What do you call a reindeer who’s a detective? A clue-nosed investigator, always sniffing out the truth and tracking down winter mysteries.
• My therapist told me to embrace December, so I’m now wearing a Santa hat to all my appointments and spreading holiday cheer, the holidays are here.

December Dad Jokes: Corny Humor for the Holidays

‘December Dad Jokes’ is your guide to surviving the holidays with laughter! Packed with corny puns about snow, Santa, and festive traditions, it’s the perfect antidote to seasonal stress. Prepare for eye-rolls and groans as you unleash these gems at family gatherings. Embrace the dad joke spirit and spread some…

• I’m really good at wrapping presents. I could easily make a living wrapping, if it wasn’t for all the unwrapping.
• This December, my goal is to finish all my projects before the new year. But I’m pretty sure my procrastination skills are Yule-timately going to win.
• Why was Santa’s little helper feeling down? Because he had low elf esteem.
• My doctor told me to cut back on holiday stress, so I put a sprig of mistletoe over his door.
• I’m convinced that the secret to a perfect December is a combination of fuzzy socks, Christmas carols, and a complete disregard for my diet, and I am sticking to that.
• What does Santa call his reindeer when they are behaving badly? Reindeer Games!
• I tried to take a picture of fog this December morning, but I mist.
• I love December because it gives me a valid excuse to wear a Santa hat everywhere, even to the grocery store, to spread holiday cheer.
• Why was the snowman always invited to holiday parties? Because he was cool.
• I’ve been so good this year that I’m on Santa’s “nice” list and the IRS’s “naughty” list.
• What do you call an elf who sings? A Wrapper!
• I’m convinced that the key to surviving holiday gatherings is to have a secret stash of candy canes for emergency snacking and a quick escape.
• What do snowmen like to do on the weekend? Chill out!
• I’m only Decembering all my energy into getting ready for the holidays; I can always recover from all the chaos in January, or February.
• Why did the ornament go to therapy in December? It had too many unresolved issues hanging around.

New Year’s Eve December Puns: Start the Year with a Smile

December’s here, bringing festive cheer and, of course, puns! Get ready to sleigh into the new year with a smile, thanks to some clever wordplay. “New Year’s Eve December Puns: Start the Year with a Smile” offers a delightful collection to lighten the mood at holiday gatherings. Prepare for some…

• This December, I’m on a strict diet of holiday cheer and ignoring my bank account statements.
• My Christmas spirit is directly proportional to the amount of peppermint mocha I consume this December.
• I’m challenging myself to learn a new skill this December: wrapping oddly shaped presents without losing my sanity.
• Warning: Excessive consumption of eggnog may spontaneously cause uncontrollable Christmas carol singing, dance at your own risk.
• This December, my relationship with my couch is getting serious; we’re talking matching pajamas and a lifetime commitment to binge-watching.
• I’m writing a book about surviving the holidays; it’s a chilling tale of awkward family gatherings, gift exchanges, and holiday shopping mall.
• This December, I’m exploring new hobbies, like staring blankly at the snow and contemplating the absence of sunlight, and I am getting good at it.
• I’m convinced that the secret to a perfect December is a combination of fuzzy socks, a roaring fire, and a complete disregard for my diet.
• My December workout plan consists of briskly walking to the fridge and lifting snacks to my mouth, a surprisingly effective workout for the soul.
• I’m convinced that the secret to a perfect New Year’s Eve party is a combination of good friends, good food, and a complete disregard for the year that just ended.
• My January resolution is to be more organized, which means color-coding my chocolate stash by percentage of cacao.
• I told my wife that I was going to start watching more holiday movies. She said, “Great, now you’ll understand the offsides rule!”
• I’m going to need a long January vacation to recover from all the holiday cheer, family gatherings, and excessive eggnog consumption.
• This December, I’m embracing my inner elf, and will be spreading holiday cheer and leaving a trail of glitter wherever I go.
• I’m convinced that the secret to a perfect December is a combination of Christmas carols, a roaring fire, and a complete disregard for my credit card balance.