· Food  · 8 min read

Shell Out Some Laughs: The Ultimate Collection of Crab Jokes and Puns

Feeling crabby? Turn that frown upside down with our claw-some collection of the funniest crab jokes and puns!

Feeling crabby? Don’t be! It’s time to unleash your inner comedian with a tidal wave of crab jokes and puns that are guaranteed to make you shell out some laughter. Whether you’re a seasoned punster or just looking for a claw-some way to brighten your day, prepare to be hooked by our collection of crustacean-themed humor.

From snappy one-liners to intricately crafted crab-based wordplay, we’ve got something for everyone. Get ready to scuttle into a world of hilarity as we explore the funniest crab jokes and puns the internet has to offer. Let’s dive in!

Shell Out Some Laughs: The Ultimate Collection of Crab Jokes and Puns


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  • Why don’t crabs give to charity? Because they’re shellfish!
  • What do you call a crab that’s good at opening locks? A crackin’ crab!
  • My friend asked if I knew any crab puns. I told him I’m a bit crabby at the moment.
  • What do crabs use to pay for things? Sand dollars!
  • Two crabs are walking along the beach. One asks the other, “Are you going to the Shell station?” The other replies, “I don’t know, I might just go sideways.”
  • What do you call a crab that’s always complaining? A crabby patty!
  • Why was the crab so good at baseball? Because he always got to third base!
  • I saw a crab wearing a shell bra the other day. I guess you could say it was…shore to please!
  • What’s a crab’s favorite subject in school? Shell-ology!
  • A crab walks into a bank and asks for a loan. The loan officer says, “We’ll need some collateral.” The crab replies, “I’ve got plenty of shell-ter!”
  • Heard about the crab who became a famous comedian? He really knew how to get you claw-king!
  • Why did the crab cross the road? To get to the other tide!
  • My therapist told me I have a crab mentality. I guess I’m always pinching people’s ideas.
  • What do you call a crab that’s afraid of heights? Claw-strophobic!
  • A crab and a lobster are having a fight. The crab says, “I’m going to pinch you!” The lobster replies, “Oh yeah? Well, I’m going to boil you!” The crab gulps and says, “Okay, okay, truce!”

Crab Jokes: The Classics Never Get Old


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Some jokes are timeless, just like the steady sideways scuttle of a crab. These classic crab jokes are the tried-and-true material, guaranteed to elicit a chuckle or groan, depending on your appreciation for punny humor. They’re the foundations of crab-related comedy, and they’re here to stay.

Crab Jokes: The Classics Never Get Old

  • What do you call a crab that’s always complaining? A crab-BY!
  • Why did the crab blush? Because he saw the ocean’s bottom!
  • What do crabs use to build their homes? Sand-tools!
  • Where do crabs go to dance? To the shell-ebration!
  • What’s a crab’s favorite subject in school? Shell-ography!
  • What do you call a crab that robs banks? A claw-breaker!
  • What did the crab say to the fisherman? “I’m feeling crabby today!”
  • What’s a crab’s favorite sport? Shell-fie taking!
  • Why did the crab cross the road? To get to the other tide!
  • What do you call a sad crab? A blue crab.

Short and Snappy Crab Puns for a Quick Laugh

Sometimes, you just need a quick dose of humor. These short and snappy crab puns are perfect for that. They’re punchy, to the point, and deliver a satisfyingly silly crab-related chuckle. Ideal for sharing on social media or slipping into everyday conversation!

Short and Snappy Crab Puns for a Quick Laugh

  • Feeling crab-ulous!
  • Don’t be crabby!
  • Keep clam and carry on. (close enough!)
  • Seas the day! (with claws)
  • Totally claw-some!
  • I’m shell-shocked!
  • Crabby hour!
  • Life’s a beach!
  • Just crab-walking through life.
  • Let’s shell-abrate!

Crab Jokes for Kids: Family-Friendly Fun

Looking for some clean, kid-appropriate humor? These crab jokes are perfect for the whole family. They’re silly, engaging, and guaranteed to bring smiles to little faces. Get ready for some shell-arious laughter with these family-friendly crab jokes!

Crab Jokes for Kids: Family-Friendly Fun

  • What do you call a crab that can’t share? Shell-fish!
  • What is a crab’s favorite game? Catch!
  • What do you call a crab that’s a detective? Inspector Clouseau! (Claw-seau)
  • Why did the crab get detention? He kept pinching his classmates!
  • What kind of pictures do crabs take? Shell-fies!
  • What do crabs eat for breakfast? Sea-reals!
  • Where do crabs go to learn? Crabby school!
  • What do you call a crab that’s always late? Tardy-grade!
  • What does a crab use to call his friends? A shell-phone!
  • What is a crab’s favorite dance? The claw-ga!

Crab Puns That Are Absolutely Claw-some


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Prepare for some truly claw-some puns that will leave you feeling like you’ve won the crustacean comedy lottery! These puns are so good, they’re practically criminal (in a good, punny way, of course). Get ready to flex your funny bone with these amazing jokes.

Crab Puns That Are Absolutely Claw-some

  • I’m not shore if I can handle these crab puns.
  • Feeling crab-tivating today!
  • This joke is unbe-LEAF-able! (Close enough to a sea leaf!)
  • Hope you’re having a crab-tastic day!
  • These puns are claw-ver!
  • I’m in a crab-solutely great mood!
  • Let’s get this shell-abration started!
  • Don’t be a shell-out and buy the drinks!
  • This party is going to be crab-ulous!
  • I’m feeling a little crab-by without my coffee.

Crab Jokes About Their Shells and Homes

A crab’s shell is its castle, its safe haven, and a source of endless comedic potential. These jokes explore the unique relationship crabs have with their shells and homes. Prepare for jokes that are both punny and insightful (sort of) about the crabby life.

Crab Jokes About Their Shells and Homes

  • Why did the crab move houses? He needed a bigger shell-ter!
  • What did the crab say when he found a new shell? “Home sweet home!”
  • How do crabs decorate their shells? With sea-sonal decor!
  • What’s a crab’s favorite type of home improvement? Shell-evating the decor!
  • Why was the crab’s shell always dirty? He was a messy hermit!
  • What do you call a crab with no shell? Naked!
  • What’s a crab’s dream house? A condo with a view of the ocean!
  • Why did the crab buy a new shell? He outgrew his old one!
  • What do crabs use to clean their shells? Shell-wax!
  • How do crabs keep their shells shiny? With sea-cret polish!

Crab Puns About Food: Deliciously Funny

Crabs aren’t just funny; they’re also delicious (to some!). These jokes combine the humor of crab puns with the deliciousness of seafood. Get ready for a feast of laughter with these food-related crab puns that are sure to tickle your taste buds and funny bone.

Crab Puns About Food: Deliciously Funny

  • What’s a crab’s favorite dish? Claw-iflower!
  • Why did the crab get a job at the restaurant? He had a knack for claw-inary arts!
  • How do crabs like their eggs? Crab-scrambled!
  • What do you call a crab chef? A claw-gourmet!
  • What’s a crab’s favorite dessert? Mud pie!
  • Why did the crab open a bakery? He heard the dough was on the rise (like the tide!)
  • What’s a crab’s favorite type of candy? Sea-salt caramels!
  • What do crabs drink at a party? Claw-tail!
  • What’s a crab’s favorite type of sushi? A crab roll!
  • What did the crab say about the seafood buffet? “This is crab-ulous!”

Crab Jokes About Crabby Personalities

Crabs are often associated with being “crabby,” and this section dives into that humorous stereotype. These jokes explore the funny side of grumpy crustaceans and their less-than-sunny dispositions. Prepare for some laughs about the ups and downs of being a crabby crab.

Crab Jokes About Crabby Personalities

  • Why was the crab so grumpy? He woke up on the wrong tide!
  • How do you cheer up a crab? Tell him a shell-arious joke!
  • What’s a crab’s biggest pet peeve? People stepping on their sandcastles!
  • Why did the crab get sent to time-out? He was being too crabby!
  • What does a crab say when he’s annoyed? “Oh, for shell’s sake!”
  • How do crabs resolve arguments? They have a claw-versation!
  • Why did the crab refuse to share his toys? He was shell-fish!
  • What’s a crab’s least favorite day of the week? Moanday!
  • What do you call a crab that’s always complaining? A crab-moaner!
  • Why don’t crabs like giving directions? Because they only walk sideways!

Crab Puns for Special Occasions

From birthdays to holidays, these crab puns are perfect for adding a touch of crustacean humor to any special occasion. Whether you’re sending a card or giving a toast, these puns will bring a smile to everyone’s face. It’s time to shell-abrate!

Crab Puns for Special Occasions

  • Happy Birthday! Hope you have a crab-ulous day!
  • Merry Christmas! May your days be merry and bright, and your tide be high!
  • Happy Valentine’s Day! You’re claw-some!
  • Happy Anniversary! Here’s to many more years of being in sync like two crabs!
  • Congratulations on your graduation! Now go out there and seas the world!
  • Happy Father’s Day! You’re the best crab-dad I could ask for!
  • Happy Mother’s Day! Thanks for being so claw-some, Mom!
  • Happy New Year! May this year be crab-tivating!
  • Get well soon! Hope you’re back to your claw-some self soon!
  • Congratulations on the new baby! Welcome to the world, little crab!
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