· Object and Things  · 9 min read

Screw Loose? 50 Hilarious Screw Jokes & Nutty Puns!

Get your fill of funny with these screw jokes and puns! Guaranteed to tighten up your humor & loosen your laughter. Click now!

Ready to have your funny bone tightened? Get set to explore the wonderfully twisted world of screw jokes and puns! Whether you’re a DIY enthusiast, a seasoned comedian, or just someone who appreciates a good chuckle, this post is guaranteed to drive you nuts (pun intended!).

We’re diving deep into the hilarious universe where hardware meets humor. From clever wordplay to groan-worthy one-liners, prepare to be screwed over… with laughter!

So, grab your toolbox of wit, and let’s get started. We promise this will be a bolt of fun!

Screw Loose? 50 Hilarious Screw Jokes & Nutty Puns!


Related Object and Things Post:


  • Why did the screw break up with the bolt? They just couldn’t seem to stay together!
  • I tried to write a joke about a Phillips head screw, but it just didn’t have the right drive.
  • What do you call a screw that’s always complaining? A whiner-head screw!
  • Meme Idea: Image of a single screw sitting alone at a table. Caption: “Me at parties.”
  • My boss asked me to find the Allen wrench. I told him I couldn’t. He said, “What’s the matter? Are you screwed up?”
  • Meme Idea: Picture of a screw labeled “My Expectations” and a stripped screw labeled “Reality.”
  • Why did the screw go to therapy? It had too many unresolved issues!
  • Joke: A screw walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender says, “Sorry, we don’t serve your kind here.” The screw replies, “Well, I’ll be bolted!”
  • Meme Idea: Image of a screw with a superhero cape. Caption: “Saving the day, one thread at a time.”
  • What’s a screw’s favorite type of music? Heavy metal!
  • Two screws are walking down the street. One says to the other, “I feel a little loose today.”
  • Meme Idea: A screw with googly eyes. Caption: “I have no idea what I’m doing.”
  • I’m starting a band called “The Screws.” We only play covers.
  • Joke: A guy walks into a hardware store and asks for a left-handed screw. The clerk says, “Sure, we have those. How many do you need?” The guy replies, “All of them! I’m building a time machine!”
  • Meme Idea: Picture of a toolbox overflowing with screws. Caption: “My commitment to DIY projects.”

Screw Jokes: A Tight Collection of Puns


Related Object and Things Post:


Screw jokes are a cornerstone of pun-based humor, relying on the double meaning of “screw” – a fastener and an action. This section offers a selection of jokes that exploit this ambiguity, providing a mix of silly and surprisingly clever wordplay. Get ready to tighten your funny bone and enjoy these twisted tales!

Screw Jokes: A Tight Collection of Puns

  • What did the screw say to the nut? “I’m screwed!”
  • Why did the screw break up with the bolt? It said, “I need some space!”
  • I tried to make a screw joke, but it didn’t quite stick.
  • I’m a screw-up… or at least that’s what my boss tells me.
  • What’s a screw’s favorite type of music? Heavy metal.
  • How does a screw feel after a long day? Screwed.
  • I’m reading a book about screws. It’s got me all twisted.
  • Two screws are walking down the street. One says, “Hey, wanna get hammered?”
  • Why did the screw go to therapy? It had too much pressure.
  • A screw walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender says, “Hey, we don’t serve your kind here.” The screw replies, “Well, that’s discriminatory!”

The Best Screw Puns for DIY Enthusiasts

For the weekend warrior and the seasoned carpenter alike, screw puns offer a humorous break from the serious business of DIY projects. This collection of puns caters specifically to those who know their Phillips from their flatheads. Prepare to chuckle as you build something and fix something!

The Best Screw Puns for DIY Enthusiasts

  • I’m really nailing this DIY project… wait, wrong fastener! Screwing it up, actually!
  • I told my wife I was going to fix the leaky faucet. She said, “Don’t screw it up!”
  • Keep your friends close, and your screws even closer. You never know when you’ll need them.
  • My DIY skills are a little… loose. Need to tighten up a bit.
  • What do you call a screw that’s always losing its head? A headless screw.
  • I tried to build a shelf with just screws. It all fell apart; I was lacking support.
  • My wife asked me to fix the gate. I’m screwed. I have no idea how.
  • You could say that I’m pretty screwed since I bought the wrong kind of screws.
  • I’m so good at DIY projects. I’m absolutely screwing it! (sarcastically)
  • I got screws for days! Just kidding, I went to the hardware store.

Why Screw Jokes Always Get a Laugh

Screw jokes, despite their simplicity, tap into a universal appreciation for wordplay and the absurdity of applying human characteristics to inanimate objects. They leverage the familiarity of a common object to create unexpected and humorous scenarios, creating a moment of surprise and delight.

Why Screw Jokes Always Get a Laugh

  • Because they’re screwed up! (As an answer to the header question)
  • My humor may be screwed, but it’s all I’ve got.
  • You could say screw jokes are really… riveting. Wait, wrong fastener again.
  • Screw jokes are funny because they’re relatable. We’ve all been screwed at some point!
  • I think screw jokes are a bit loose, but they still hold up.
  • The best screw jokes are the ones that really tighten up your funny bone.
  • People love screw jokes because they’re easy to understand. No need to overthink them!
  • Why did the screw cross the road? Because it was screwed to the chicken.
  • If I had a dollar for every screw joke I told, I’d be… well, screwed. (because I’d spend it all on screws)
  • What do you call an evil screw? A screwball!

Screw Puns: Are They Nuts or Hilarious?


Related Object and Things Post:


The question of whether screw puns are genuinely funny or simply groan-inducing often sparks debate. This section explores the fine line between clever wordplay and utter corniness, inviting readers to decide for themselves if these puns are a stroke of genius or just plain nuts.

Screw Puns: Are They Nuts or Hilarious?

  • They’re nuts! Hilariously nuts!
  • You be the judge. Are they tight or loose?
  • My screw puns are so bad, they’re good… maybe.
  • I’m not sure if these puns are genius or just plain screwed up.
  • Some people think screw puns are a waste, but I think they’re a-bolt-utely hilarious!
  • These puns might leave you feeling a little… screwed over.
  • Is it the screw puns or the nut that’s driving you crazy?
  • I’m on the fence about screw puns. Maybe I just need to be screwed into place.
  • My screw puns are so corny, they’re practically a vegetable.
  • Are screw puns the glue holding my comedy routine together or are they just screwing it up?

How to Write Your Own Screw Jokes

Crafting screw jokes involves playing with the double meaning of “screw” and finding creative ways to apply it to different scenarios. This section provides tips and techniques for generating your own pun-tastic screw jokes, encouraging readers to unleash their inner comedian and get creative.

How to Write Your Own Screw Jokes

  • Start with “screw” and think of words it sounds like! (e.g. “Scrooge”)
  • What does a screw say when it’s leaving? “I’m outta here, screw you guys!”
  • Think of situations where you might feel “screwed over” and make a joke about it.
  • A screw and a screwdriver walk into a bar… (Finish the joke!)
  • Consider the different types of screws and make puns about them. (e.g. “flathead”)
  • Remember, the best screw jokes are unexpected and slightly absurd.
  • Use the double meaning of “tight” to add another layer of humor.
  • Don’t be afraid to be corny! Screw jokes are all about embracing the silliness.
  • Start with a situation, then add a screw-related punchline. I.E. My DIY project? Screwed.
  • The key to writing great screw jokes? Practice, practice, practice!

Screw Jokes for Kids: Clean and Corny

Screw jokes can be enjoyed by audiences of all ages. This section provides a collection of clean and corny screw jokes that are suitable for children, offering lighthearted entertainment that avoids any inappropriate or suggestive humor. These jokes are perfect for family gatherings and classroom laughs.

Screw Jokes for Kids: Clean and Corny

  • What do you call a happy screw? A screwball!
  • Why did the screw get an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!
  • What is a screw’s favorite game? Twister!
  • Why did the screw go to school? To get a little bit smarter!
  • What do you call a screw that tells jokes? A screwball comedian!
  • What did the screw say to his mom? “I’m all screwed up!”
  • What do screws wear on Halloween? Screw-tiful costumes!
  • What is a screw’s favorite dessert? Screw-berry shortcake!
  • Did you hear about the screw that won the race? He was really screwed on!
  • What did the screw say when he was falling? “This is screw-icidal!”

Screw Puns in Pop Culture: Examples and References

Screw-related puns and references pop up in various forms of pop culture, from movies and TV shows to song lyrics and advertising campaigns. This section highlights examples of how “screw” is used humorously in popular media, showcasing the widespread appeal and versatility of this pun-friendly word.

Screw Puns in Pop Culture: Examples and References

  • Remember that time Homer Simpson said, “Doh!” after screwing something up? (Classic!)
  • That one time in Star Wars when someone needed the right screw for the Millenium Falcon…
  • “I’m screwed” - Every character in a horror movie, ever.
  • “Screw it, let’s do it!” - The unofficial motto of every college student.
  • That time someone sang, “I’m all screwed up over you!” in a love song…
  • Remember that commercial where the guy said, “I’m screwed if I don’t get this deal”?
  • What did the Screw say to the Terminator? “I’ll be back… with a screwdriver!”
  • I saw a superhero movie where the villain was called “The Screwball.”
  • In the movie “Screwed”, well… that’s self explanatory!
  • “Don’t get screwed!” - common phrase used by car salesman…

The Psychology of Screw Jokes: Why We Find Them Funny

Delving into the psychology behind screw jokes reveals that their humor lies in the incongruity and surprise elements of puns. The unexpected juxtaposition of the literal and figurative meanings of “screw” triggers a cognitive shift, resulting in a moment of amusement and satisfaction.

The Psychology of Screw Jokes: Why We Find Them Funny

  • Because our brains love patterns, and puns break them!
  • Because it makes us feel smart when we “get” the joke.
  • Because laughter is a release of tension, and screw jokes are low-stakes.
  • Because we’re all a little bit screwed up, and we can relate.
  • Because it’s a way to cope with the frustrations of DIY projects.
  • Because puns are the lowest form of humor, and sometimes that’s what we need.
  • Because it’s a way to connect with others through shared laughter.
  • Because it’s a distraction from the stresses of everyday life.
  • Because the unexpectedness of a pun jolts our brain.
  • Because humor is subjective, and some people just find screw jokes funny, dammit!
Back to Blog

Related Posts

View All Posts »