· USA States Puns And Jokes · 8 min read
Virginia is for Laughers: Best Jokes & Puns About the Old Dominion
Get ready to chuckle! Discover hilarious Virginia jokes and puns that'll make you say, "Oh, Shenandoah!" Read on for laughs!
Looking for a good laugh with a touch of southern charm? You’ve come to the right place! Get ready to explore the hilarious side of the Old Dominion with our collection of Virginia jokes and puns. From its historical landmarks to its stunning natural landscapes, Virginia offers plenty of fodder for witty wordplay.
Whether you’re a Virginian native, a curious tourist, or simply someone who appreciates a good pun, we’ve got something to tickle your funny bone. Prepare yourself for a mix of historical humor, geographical giggles, and good old-fashioned dad jokes, all centered around the great state of Virginia.
Virginia is for Laughers: Best Jokes & Puns About the Old Dominion
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- Why did the Jamestown settler bring a ladder to Virginia? He heard the living was pretty high!
- What do you call a lazy kangaroo in Virginia? Pouch-tentially unemployed.
- I’m reading a book about the history of the Revolutionary War in Virginia…it’s revoltingly good!
- I told my friend from Richmond a joke about Roanoke, but he just Virginia-splained why it wasn’t funny.
- Why did the tomato turn red in Virginia? Because it saw the Shenandoah Valley! (Valley red, get it?)
- I tried to make a Virginia-themed smoothie. It was a complete Jamestown mess.
- What’s Virginia’s favorite type of music? Country… roads, take me home!
- “Knock, knock.”
- “Who’s there?”
- “Vir-ginia.”
- “Vir-ginia who?”
- “Vir-ginia going to open the door already? It’s freezing out here!”
- Did you hear about the Virginian who opened a bakery? He’s making a killing on Jamestown tarts!
- I asked a Virginian for directions to Monticello. He said, “Just follow the Thomas Jefferson Memorial Highway… it’s impossible to miss.”
- Two peanuts were walking down the street in Virginia. One was assaulted. Peanut butter? I hardly know her! (Virginia is a peanut growing state)
Virginia Jokes About History and Founding Fathers
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Virginia’s history is rich with pivotal moments and iconic figures like Washington, Jefferson, and Madison. This section celebrates that legacy with humor, poking fun at their quirks, accomplishments, and the historical events that shaped the Commonwealth. Prepare for some witty takes on the past!
- Why did George Washington refuse to sit down? He didn’t want to be called “seated”!
- What did Thomas Jefferson say when he finished writing the Declaration of Independence? “Another draft beer, please!”
- I tried to write a biography of James Madison, but it was too… brief.
- Why did Patrick Henry get a bad grade in history? He kept giving liberty or death speeches instead of answering the questions!
- What’s George Washington’s favorite type of music? Old Dominion!
- Heard about the Founding Fathers playing hide-and-seek? Everyone kept looking for George!
- What’s a Founding Father’s favorite drink? Liber-tea!
- Why did they build the White House in DC and not Virginia? Because all the good bricks were already used in Monticello!
- What did George Washington say when he saw the first airplane? “Well, I declare!”
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Jefferson. Jefferson who? Jefferson getting anything done around here?
Virginia Puns About Cities and Towns
From Alexandria to Williamsburg, Virginia boasts a diverse array of cities and towns, each with its own unique character. This section plays on the names and notable features of these locales to create clever and chuckle-worthy puns. Get ready to have a Richmond good time!
- I tried to visit Roanoke, but I didn’t have enough Roa-no-cash!
- Williamsburg is so historic, it’s absolutely Williams-burying you in the past!
- I’m Arlington my luggage. I hope it made the flight!
- I’m having a Richmond good time, hope you are too.
- Going to Virginia Beach? Don’t forget your Virginia Beach-wear!
- I Alexandria forgot my keys! Now I’m locked out.
- Did you hear about the guy who opened a bakery in Norfolk? He was Norfolk-using his talent!
- What do you call a sad street in Charlottesville? Blue Ridge Depression.
- I’m Petersburg-ing my hopes on this deal going through.
- That was a Danville good show!
Virginia Jokes Highlighting Natural Beauty
Virginia’s natural beauty is undeniable, from the Blue Ridge Mountains to the Chesapeake Bay. This section celebrates the stunning landscapes and outdoor activities with puns and jokes that capture the essence of Virginia’s scenic wonders. Get ready to appreciate the great outdoors with a smile!
- What do you call a lazy mountain in the Blue Ridge? A slow-poke-ahontas!
- Why did the river cross the Virginia countryside? To get to the other tide!
- The Chesapeake Bay is so beautiful, it’s bay-ond belief!
- I went hiking in Shenandoah, it was Shenan-do-amazing!
- What do you call a nervous stream in Virginia? A jitter-rill.
- The fall foliage in Virginia is so vibrant, it’s leaf-ing me breathless!
- Why did the beach get a ticket? For indecent exposure!
- I’m feeling Blue Ridge-tful for all this beauty.
- What did the Virginia tree say to the lumberjack? Leaf me alone!
- My vacation in Virginia was re-leaf-ing.
Virginia Puns Referencing Food and Drink
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From Smithfield ham to Virginia wines, the Commonwealth offers a delicious array of culinary delights. This section serves up a heaping helping of food and drink-related puns that are sure to satisfy your appetite for humor. Get ready to dig in and laugh!
- I’m Virginia Ham-mered after trying all these samples!
- Let’s wine down with some Virginia wine!
- This Virginia peanut is nuts!
- I’m having a brew-tiful time at this Virginia brewery!
- What do you call a happy potato in Virginia? A tater-tot-ally awesome spud!
- What’s Virginia’s favorite dessert? Shoofly pie, it’s sweet-ly nostalgic.
- Why did the tomato turn red in Virginia? Because it saw the salad dressing!
- I’m crab-solutely loving this Chesapeake Bay seafood!
- What did the grape say when it got stepped on in Virginia? Nothing, it just let out a little wine.
- Let’s get apple-solutely smashed with cider!
Virginia Jokes About Virginia Tech and UVA
The rivalry between Virginia Tech and UVA is legendary, and this section taps into that spirited competition with good-natured jokes and puns. Whether you’re a Hokie or a Cavalier, get ready to laugh at the quirks and traditions of these two iconic universities.
- What do you call a Hokies fan in a suit? The defendant!
- Why did the UVA student bring a ladder to the football game? To get to the next level!
- How many UVA students does it take to change a lightbulb? One to hold the bulb and four to discuss how Thomas Jefferson would have done it.
- Why are Virginia Tech fans bad at hide-and-seek? Because no one can find them in the ACC Championship game.
- I’m a Hokie, and I’m sticking to it!
- What’s a UVA student’s favorite color? Wahoo blue!
- What do you call a UVA student walking backwards? A retiree.
- Why did the Virginia Tech student bring a pencil to the football game? In case they needed to draw a foul.
- Heard about the UVA student who invented a see-through dress? He wanted to see what his tuition money went towards.
- What do you call a Virginia Tech engineering student at a party? The designated driver.
Virginia Puns About Virginia’s Wildlife
From black bears to bald eagles, Virginia is home to a diverse array of wildlife. This section celebrates the Commonwealth’s fauna with puns and jokes that are sure to make you roar with laughter. Get ready to unleash your inner animal pun enthusiast!
- I’m bear-ly able to contain my excitement about Virginia’s wildlife!
- These wild horses are neigh-tly impressive!
- That bald eagle is eagle-ly watching for its prey!
- Did you hear about the Virginia squirrel who started a bank? He was saving for a nutty retirement!
- What do you call a group of singing opossums? A possum-bility!
- I’m so fawned of Virginia’s deer.
- What’s a Virginia crab’s favorite dance? The crab walk!
- What do you call a smart Virginia raccoon? A trash panda genius!
- I’m bat-ty about Virginia’s cave systems and bats.
- Why did the turtle cross the road in Virginia? To get to the shell station!
Virginia Jokes About Virginia Drivers
Let’s be honest, Virginia drivers have a certain reputation. This section embraces the stereotypes with humor, poking fun at the quirks and habits of those behind the wheel in the Commonwealth. Get ready for some relatable and laugh-out-loud observations!
- What do you call a Virginia driver who uses their turn signal? A tourist!
- Why did the Virginia driver get a ticket? For going too slow in the left lane!
- Virginia drivers are so bad, they think a yield sign is just a suggestion!
- I saw a Virginia driver using their phone, eating a sandwich, and applying makeup all at the same time!
- What’s a Virginia driver’s favorite hobby? Tailgating… both at football games and on the highway!
- I heard a Virginia driver was arguing with their GPS because it didn’t understand “Virginia math.”
- Why are Virginia drivers so cautious? They’re afraid of the traffic circles.
- My Virginia driving instructor told me to expect the unexpected. I haven’t stopped honking since.
- How do you know you’re in Virginia? The traffic is moving at the speed of dial-up internet.
- What’s a Virginia driver’s favorite song? “Slow Ride.”
Virginia Puns That Are Pure Virginia Charm
This section is dedicated to puns that encapsulate the unique charm and spirit of Virginia. These jokes celebrate the Commonwealth’s culture, history, and overall appeal, offering a warm and witty tribute to everything that makes Virginia special. Prepare to be charmed!
- I’m Virginia-ly in love with this state!
- Virginia is a common-wealth of beauty and history!
- Everything is just peachy in Virginia.
- I’m feeling blue ridge-ally happy here.
- Virginia is simply irresistible-burg!
- Virginia is plantation-tastic!
- Feeling very Vir-genuine here.
- Virginia is history-cal!
- Virginia is seashore-ly beautiful.
- Virginia is berry special to me.
